39 Posts Mocking Crazy, Unusual Or Overly Complicated Names, As Shared In This Online Group (New Pics) (2024)

Parenting

"No, we can’t name her that because there was a girl in middle school by that name who bullied me. No, no, that’s my cousin’s name. That rhymes with a bad word, and kids will definitely figure it out by second grade. No, I don’t like that name. That’s too common. That’s too long and difficult to spell. I give up! Let’s just make up a name!"

If you’re a parent, there is a good chance you’re familiar with the experience of spending months searching high and low for theperfectname for your little one. Choosing a name can be extremely daunting at first, when you’re unsure of what will be common or popular 5, 10, or 50 years from now, and if you had to deal with name-based bullying as a child, you want to protect your kids from the same fate. But when in doubt, I always like to say “better safe than sorry”. Because if you get too creative with your child’s name, you might end up paying the price by being mocked online…

Below, we’ve gathered some of our favorite posts fromthe Name Nerds Jerks subreddit that is dedicated to name-shaming, as well as an interview with the group's moderator team to gain some insight about the community. As its description states, “No name is safe.” So be sure to upvote all of the posts featuring names that you can’t believe are actually on birth certificates somewhere out there, and then let us know in the comments what the most ridiculous baby names you’ve ever heard are.

Keep reading to also find an interview with Sherri Suzanne, professional baby name consultant and founder of My Name For Life. Enjoy this list of names that we can only hope are satire, and then if you are looking for suggestions to send your arch-enemy when they are naming their next child, check out Bored Panda’s last article on this same subredditright here.

To learn more about how the Name Nerds Jerks group began, we reached out to the moderator team on Reddit. "This sub started as a joke - there was a post on the main Name Nerds sub that inspired me to comment about how we needed [another] sub," one of the moderators, Kydashian, told Bored Panda. "Meg (another moderator) responded that she made it, and then my exact comment was 'mod me, daddy'. Boom, new sub."

"I don’t think either of us ever thought there were going to be this many like-minded jerks, but it has been so much fun! I think our community has taken off because it’s a place where you can truly be honest and have other people chime in," Kydashian explained. "If you ask your cousin what they named their baby and they respond with something ridiculous, you’re probably going to smile and say something kind. However, you bring that name to our subreddit, and we’re all going to laugh with you. Like any subreddit, there are some 'go-to comments' that show up on the main, that we will comment as a joke and it’s just a fun place to laugh at the absurdity of it all. I dare you to post 'I’m thinking of Juniper' and let the sub tell you what they think. I think we’re a good outlet for some people to be able to joke around and let off steam over some petty things."

We also asked if they had any advice for people considering making up a name for their children. "Thinking of naming your kid something unique that you made up? [We] have one piece of advice: Don’t."

"But seriously - children grow up to have their own full adult lives and will have to sign their mortgage, apply for jobs, and have professional relationships for the majority of their lives," Kydashian shared. "Keep that in mind!"

The group is lighthearted and fun, but the moderators raise some valid points. Please don't make your children's lives easier the second you name them.

To gain some insight from a baby naming expert, we reached out to professional baby name consultant and founder of My Name For Life, Sherri Suzanne. First, we wanted to hear what inspired Sherri to get into this field. "I’ve had a lifelongpassion for onomastics (study of names) and started my name database at age 7and still use it today!" Sherri told Bored Panda. "Namesare like art—they represent different styles andcultures and sounds and looks. I collect names like some people collectsculpture or painting."

"I’ve been naming sinceelementary school—family members, dolls, pets—for anyone I could pester to letme help," Sherri says."I wasmanaging editor ofmagazine in New York when I first assisted a pregnant co-worker name her child.She mentioned it toanother mom-to-be who mentioned it to another until I washelping parents by word of mouth quietly throughout the Nineties. Ibegan toformalize my procedures in the 2000s and brought my services to the web about 12years ago."

We also asked Sherri why she thinks there is a trend of naming children strange names. "To be honest, many of the mostpeculiar names people cite to me are the stuff of urban legends," she told Bored Panda. "I think theyenjoy seeing myreaction. Having said that, there havealwaysbeen parents who stretch the envelope when it comes tonaming. But I think moreparents are being adventurous namers nowadays as aresult of being exposed to a variety of tastes and styles via the internet.Addin the fact that many pop-culture figures have names 'outside the box', and youcan see the temptation for many parents tojoin in."

"In truth, whileoriginality and individuality are part of 21st-century culture, theoverwhelming majority of parents want theirchild to stand out but also to fitin," Sherri explained.

We also asked if she thinks parents should have complete free range when it comes to naming their kids. "In general, I’m not infavor of imposing regulations," she shared. "But I absolutelythink common sense mustprevail! The Golden Rule is to nameselflessly, putting the child first."

We also wanted to hear from the expert how parents can strike the perfect balance of picking a unique name that will stand the test of time without going too far out of the box. "As I mentioned, it’s achallenge for modern parents to help their child stand out while fitting in," Sherri said. "Oneof the most requested nametypes in my practice nowadays are familiar namesthat have fallen out of use. These names give just the right touch oforiginality while remaining comfortable. However, I uselotsof techniques to help parents bring individuality to a child’sname—from picking names in ancestral languages to finding names in literature,history and art."

So what are the most important factors parents must keep in mind when naming their children? According to Sherri, "Our future successdepends on our ability to introduce ourselves withconfidence. So parents can be creative if they wish butalso bepractical and sensitive. No names that form jokes, rhymes, puns or phrases.Express individuality in 'I’m Sofia with an ‘f’--notSophia.'I’mcautioning against creating a spelling likeSofeeyuhjust to be different. If you want to be original, better to justpick anuncommon name. A name that seems nice on paper may not work well in daily life. Liftname candidates off the page and test them out loud tomake sure they can besaid easily and with confidence. Pick a name you like tosay. You’ll be saying it a LOT."

Lastly, Sherri added, "To older children andadults with ‘adventurous’ names:If your parents gifted you with anattention-grabbing name that youlove, then go ahead and embrace it! However,if your name is a source of pain and insecurity, remember that we each havepower over what we are called. Short ofname-changing, remember that nicknames,middle names and initials are all ways to tame a wild first name."

If you'd like more naming words of wisdom from Sherri or to learn about what the most popular names are right now, be sure to check out My Name For Life right here.

It’s amazing that some of the baby names on this list were actually signed off on for multiple reasons, one of which being that both parents agreed on the name. Of course, not every child has two parents around at birth. But every parent should have a few family members or close friends that they discussed their baby names with as well. Yet somehow, there are children out there named Abcde and Imunique. According to one survey though, Kinzleighanne probably did not get her name overnight. Apparently,75% of first-time parents argueover what to name their child. In fact, baby names are the number one thing expecting parents argue over, beating out whether or not the mother should return to work and whether or not to have a second child by a longshot.

And when it comes to why baby names have become so loose over recent years, Laura Wattenberg, creator of BabyNameWizard.com toldToday, “I liken baby names to the dress code. We’ve thrown away the office dress code when it comes to naming. We’ve seen a revolution in naming where there is no such thing as a ‘normal’ name. And, while there is still a number one name, it’s only a fraction as popular as the number one name was years ago.”

After the initial excitement of finding out you’re expecting a child wears off, it’s time to start discussing names. And while most parents like to wait until they know the gender to start narrowing down names, it can still become a very heated topic. So if your partner starts suggesting names like Tryxtynn or Drittney, Carrie Felton of Stuck On You recommends a few ways you can shoot down their suggestions without causing a fight. She suggests creating a no-go list from the beginning and agreeing on a set number of ‘vetoes’ that you and your partner both get, so nobody starts getting their hopes up about a name that the other person truly hates. But when you’ve narrowed down the list a bit and there are still names you would like to discard, here are a few ways to turn your partner off to those names. One suggestion that might be questionable but should certainly do the trick is telling your partner about a past lover who had that name. “Allow your eyes to glaze over while you coo dreamily about that magical night you spent with a hot surfer named Humphrey,” Carrie explains.

Another tactic Carrie suggests for deterring your partner from fighting for a name you despise is to do your research about famous disgraced athletes, murderers, drug smugglers, etc. with that name. If you can convince them that many people will have a negative association with that name, you might be able to persuade them to start looking for other options. Finally, she says that good old-fashioned guilt can usually do the trick too. Both partners should love and be excited about the child’s name, so there is no point in settling on a name that one person won’t be thrilled to share with their friends and family. And as Carrie adds, “Depending on where you live, you will have about two months to finalize your baby’s name after birth so there’s no huge rush.” If, for some reason, the two of you still can’t decide upon meeting your baby, you can live with them for a month or two before picking a name that perfectly suits them.

Depending on where you live, you might have time after the baby is born to finalize a name, but you also might have strict laws in relation to what your baby can be called. Certain countries have approved baby name lists, which can frustrate some parents, but can also protect children from being named Anuhstee*zia. In New Zealand, for example, there is a list of banned baby names, including Christ, Messiah, Lucifer and Justice. One would hope that parents would never dream of calling their children many of the names featured on this list, but unfortunately, the list does exist for a reason. Without restrictions in place, New Zealand would have at least 31 ‘King’s, 28 ‘Princess’es, 7 ‘Majesty’s and 25 ‘Royal’s. Apparently, some names still slip through the cracks though. According to CNN, New Zealand has at least one person named Violence and another named Number 16 Bus Shelter.

According to The Washington Post, at least 12 countries currently have legislation in place regarding baby naming, including Germany, Spain, Portugal, Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Japan and Malaysia. Some nations, such as the Scandinavian democracies, have these rules in place to look out for the well-being of children and their future reputations. On the other hand, some countries, like Morocco, have banned names of certain ethnic groups. But there can also be logistical reasons for restricting certain names. Some states in the US, for example, don’t allow for diacritics to be in registered names. This means that if you would like to name your child José, he will be legally registered as Jose.

But aside from the attempted use of foreign characters or names that are just too long for government databases to handle, governments in some of these countries have rejected other names just because they are absurd (or offensive). Sweden has stopped children from being named Metallica, Superman, Veranda, Ikea, and Elvis, while Germany has rejected Matti, Osama bin Laden and Adolf Hitler as baby names. In Japan, someone tried to name their child Akuma, or devil, and in China someone simply wanted to name their baby @. New Zealand has also turned down Anal, 5th, V8 and *. Yes, someone wanted to name their child just an asterisk.

Plenty of thought should go into naming our beloved children, but we have to think about the future as well. When a kid is given a name that is extremely difficult to pronounce or spell, their life is just made harder. Parents must remember not to be selfish when naming their kids. As exciting as it feels to have the power to name your little one (almost) anything you want, don’t abuse that power. Think about what it will be like when they’re 5, 10, 20, and 50. Most people will not be thinking, “Wow, your parents are so cool for giving you a unique name!” when they encounter a Juztiss. They will likely be thinking, “Wow, you should get that name changed ASAP.” There are plenty of interesting and beautiful names that will stand the test of time. If you do enough research, I promise you’ll find one you like.

We hope you’re enjoying this list of ridiculous names people have bestowed upon their children for some reason. As funny as they may be, please remember them if you’re ever having a child, and don’t make the same mistakes these people have. I absolutely love my name, but I have still had to deal with my fair share of mispronunciations, misspellings and “Can I just call you a nickname instead?” throughout my life. I can only imagine how terrible it would be if my parents had named me Juse Bocks or Deevagurl. Keep upvoting the posts you find most atrocious, and then let us know in the comments what the worst baby name you’ve ever heard was.

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